What Type of Woman Does A Man Want?
Can a man handle a strong woman? What type of woman does a man want? We discuss our thoughts.
What type of women are men most attracted to? The girly, dependent, can’t-make-a-decision type lady? Or the fiercely independent, strong-willed, take charge, independent woman? It’s already a tough dating battlefield, so we are weighing in on the type of woman a man wants and whether we think we are the ‘strong’ type of woman and whether or not men can handle us.
I wrote the definition of ‘strong woman’ – maybe not professionally (yet!) but certainly in every other shape and form. I’ve been through hell and back in my 30ish years of existence. And all by my lonesome (ok not completely alone, I do have wonderful friends and family). But I’ve gone through close funerals, alone. I’ve gone to weddings, alone. I open jar lids, alone. I’ve traveled, alone. For the past 10 years I’ve lived, alone. Is that intimidating to a man? I think so – because I don’t need a man. Yes, there are many many many times I want a man. But not just any man. A man who can handle this ‘strong, type-A, do what I want’ persona. Do I think a man can handle a strong woman? Short answer – yes. Long answer – it takes a certain type of man to want to handle a strong woman and a certain type of man to be able to handle.
Ditto on what Laura said, I shit bullets and wash my vitamins down with tequila. (And I know what Laura can do to a UPS package delivery gone wrong, you don’t want to mess with this awesome chic.) And as a former competitive athlete, dancer, someone who’s equally had her share of life and someone who has been self-sufficient for more than a decade in a city away from her family, I’m a bit of a firecracker. And men seem to love it. I challenge them to think, to feel, to explore, to question, and I think all men want a strong woman because of these reasons, but the handling part is where it gets complicated. I’ve found many men to be drawn to me, but most can’t handle it, and they run away towards something that’s easy to fit into their lives. I’ll be honest, I can be terribly intimidating, part of that is because I’m a natural asshole (thanks dad), but I’m also super confident, and if you can’t hang, we can’t hang. I have high expectations of myself and will carry the same for you. Now stop your whining and man the fuck up. 😉 Tip for men: if you’re dating a strong woman, just let her do her thing and keep on lifting her up. She’ll likely respond by tapping into her softer side because she sees that you can handle it. Everyone wins and procreation continues.
Do I think men like strong women? My answer is a tried and true no. Ask my friends, my family, my clients and they’ll say that I’m honest to a fault and never back down. But when I act this way around men they’re intimidated, they want to be in control, even if it’s only a pseudo-in-control. When all I want to do is be in control of a situation with a guy, all I ever get is rebuke. Men love to play games (a girlfriend of mine doesn’t say it’s a game, she says it’s called ‘life in 2014’), and in order to stay in the big leagues with men you like, girls have to play the game too. That means waiting to text, not asking to hang out first, and holding back emotions…basically going against everything you really want to do. If the start of relationships worked the same as girl-on-girl friendships, you could both be text-initiators, you could both ask what’s happening this weekend, and you could both cry, laugh, or scream when you really felt like it. But, unfortunately for women, the beginnings of a relationship are not at all this way. So when we want to be this strong, independent, do-what-I-want woman, guys don’t take it so well. We have to stand back, and play the game; even as much as we hate the game, we have to play it in order to *win* the guy. And as an example of a strong, independent, do-what-I-want woman, I’m still ridiculously single.
Clearly, we (read: strong women) have strong opinions on the type of woman a man wants. If there are any single men out there willing and wanting to see just how strong we are, let us know! Warning: you may have to arm wrestle Laura.