30 Things You Should Know Before Turning 30

I used to think that by the time a person reached the age of 30 they would have gotten over his or her childish nature and made it as an adult. By 30, I would have everything figured out and life as an adult would be set… but, was I wrong.

I am nowhere near where I would have liked to be! At 30 I was working a job that while I sometimes enjoyed, wasn’t really a career; I was single; in a financial rut and still living at home with my family. I’m 32 now and while I may not have had my shit together at 30, or have it completely together at 32, I’m definitely in a better place. I’m working towards a potentially profitable career (not a job, but a career). I’m living on my own (entirely because now my entire family has moved out-of-state) and contemplating on making yet another move, to an entirely different coastline. So while I was wrong about “30”, I at least had the right idea about how things should go, even if I ended up there accidentally. With that being said I’ve broken down things you should know by the time you turn 30.

By 30, you should have:

1. One old boyfriend you can imagine going back to and one who reminds you of how far you’ve come.

I don’t just have one, I have many… More of the latter though, and very few of the first. I used to have a couple of ex boyfriends who I could imagine going back to but then when that happened I just came out worse than the first time. I am happy to say that there isn’t anyone I’d think about going back to, that in itself is a reminder of how far I’ve come.

2. A decent piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in your family.

This didn’t happen at 30, but it DID happen! After a few months abroad and then a few more unemployed… one of the first things I purchased after getting a real “grown up” job was a bed. I’d pretty much been dreaming about this bed since I was 18 and I was finally able to afford something just. for. me. Now that I’m living alone I’m thinking about all of the other furniture that I want to get, to replace everything that I inherited.

3. Something perfect to wear if the employer or man of your dreams wants to see you in an hour.

Done! Little Black Dress ya’ll. And I have plenty of them, there’s nothing like realizing you’ve got curves and buying a dress that accentuates those curves in all the right ways. Add the right accessories and you can go from day to-night in a jiff.

4. A purse, a suitcase, and an umbrella you’re not ashamed to be seen carrying.

I’ll never outgrow designers like Tokidoki, but I’m not always carrying it around with me. A lady needs a purse for every occasion so I’ve started collecting just such items.

5. A youth you’re content to move beyond.

I can’t say that I don’t miss the old party days and my partying ways… but there’s something comforting knowing that it’s mostly behind me. I think of all the things listed and this is definitely one of those the things you should realize by the time you turn 30. Don’t get me wrong, I still maintain a few friendships from my youth and it’s interesting to see how we’ve all grown. That’s not to say that we don’t still go out and come home when the sun is well above our heads, but the scene is just a bit different.

6. A past juicy enough that you’re looking forward to retelling it in your old age.

Fo’sho! Everyone has to have at least one good story…. but it’s also never too late to go out and make it happen. Just make sure that you have enough money saved up in case bail money is needed.

7. The realization that you are actually going to be old—and some money set aside to help fund it.

THIS! When I was younger I thought 30 was old, but as I got older I realized that the 30’s and byond really wasn’t that big of a deal. I’m hanging out with a somewhat older crowd now, and we’re all acting a fool from time to time, the only difference is that we’re being smarter about it. There are two parts to growing up… the fun part, and the responsible part. You have to have balance.

8. An e-mail address, a voice mailbox and a bank account—all of which nobody has access to but you.

Even before turning 30 I had this… There won’t be a His & Her Facebook account.

9. A resume that is not even the slightest bit padded.

Remember how I said I was working towards a new career? Yea, nothing removes the padding and fluff on your resume like starting over completely.

10. One friend who always makes you laugh and one who lets you cry.

Even better when that friend is one in the same. Friends are harder to come by as you get older, especially good friends. So hang on to the good ones!

11. A set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra.

Having recently moved into my own place these were on the top of my list.. well except the black lace bra. Pretty sure that was one of the first things I bought when I was able to go shopping on my own. There’s something really gratifying about having your own set of tools and being able to use them. I’ve had to assemble quite a few pieces of furniture in the last couple of months, and on my own at that!

12. Something ridiculously expensive that you bought for yourself, just because you deserve it.

I have yet to do this, while I’ve had my eye on a few things I can’t seem to buy them just yet. Don’t get me wrong, I own diamonds and pearls, but they were gifts… but, that’s all going to change soon because I’ve gotten to a point where I CAN buy things just because I deserve it.

13. The belief that you deserve it.

Please see the last line in #12 above.

14. A skin-care regimen, an exercise routine and a plan for dealing with those few other facets of life that don’t get better after 30.

This is a work in progress, I have been lucky enough that I don’t really need a skin regimen because so far I have been blessed with good genes. But I’m working on the exercise routine, because I know that if I’m not careful with that things will go south really fast.

15. A solid start on a satisfying career, a satisfying relationship, and all those other facets of life that do get better.

This… is still a work in progress.

By 30, you should know:

1. How to fall in love without losing yourself.

Admittedly this has been a problem in the past, I have always been in love with falling in love. I think you lose yourself more easily when you don’t know who you really are… and I feel that I have figured that out. Don’t get me wrong, there are still things about myself that don’t make sense or still need some figuring out, but I am becoming happy with who I am. And I feel that will help me in my future relationships.

2. How you feel about having kids.

I like kids, kids can be great… but they’re not for me. I have nieces and nephews, and thankfully they’re pretty easy-going and I can actually talk to them as if they’re adults. We’re playful, but mostly we can have conversations on a level that I can’t with most kids, and I am very thankful for that.

3. How to quit a job, break up with a man, and confront a friend without ruining the friendship.

It’s not that easy, and takes a lot of maturity to end things amicably, but it’s definitely possible and great when you can!

4. When to try harder and when to walk away.

Letting go can be hard to do… especially when you’re not really sure that you even want to. But sometimes it’s the only option. I’ve found the hardest aspect of life to do this in has been relationships, I’ve often struggled to hold on to relationships that weren’t good for me. And after a really big life altering moment I realized I was a fool for doing it. As an adult you should really know when to try harder and when not to, if only to benefit your health and sanity. You shouldn’t hold on to things that drain you or do you harm. What’s the point in that?

5. How to kiss in a way that communicates perfectly what you would and wouldn’t like to happen next.

Don’t hesitate. Or do anything that you don’t want to do, be confident and go for what you want.

6. The names of: the secretary of state, your great-grandmother and the best tailor in town.

I don’t have a tailor… but I’ve dived head first into finding out more about my family roots. Time is precious, so ask people questions when you have the chance, because searching the world-wide web can be a bit chaotic.

7. How to live alone, even if you don’t like to.

Only a few months in and while it was a bit of an adjustment I must say that I love it! I mean really, who wouldn’t love it? You get to do whatever you want, whenever without having to worry about bothering someone else.

8. How to take control of your own birthday.

It’s my birthday and I’ll cry if I want to, cry if I want to… While I love celebrating birthdays I’ve found that planning your own birthday can be a bit of a headache, and that’s if everyone shows up when they say they will. But maybe it’s just that I have bad luck with that sort of thing… This is still a work in progress.

9. That you can’t change the length of your calves, the width of your hips or the nature of your parents.

All the things you wish you could change….but can’t.

10. That your childhood may not have been perfect, but it’s over.

First I thought things couldn’t get any worse, and then I realized that a lot of bad shit can happen to you as an adult that makes your childhood look like a breeze. Keep in mind, things can always be worse, but they will always get better… eventually.

11. What you would and wouldn’t do for money or love.

Always be true to yourself, always.

12. That nobody gets away with smoking, drinking, doing drugs or not flossing for very long.

Nobody. So start taking care of yourself because if you don’t then who will?

13. Who you can trust, who you can’t and why you shouldn’t take it personally.

Reference #4 and what I said about knowing when to try harder and when to walk away.

14. Not to apologize for something that isn’t your fault.

This. Is. HUGE. And something that I still struggle with and am working on because I tend to be a timid person and I am trying to change this.

And last but definitely not least….

15. Why they say life begins at 30.

Is there anything you thought you’d have figured out by the time you turned 30? If you aren’t 30, what are some things you hope to accomplish?