4 Hilarious Stages Of Being Single On Valentine’s Day

By  |  0 Comments

If you’ve ever been single on Valentine’s Day as an adult, then you’ll completely understand these four hilarious stages of surviving the world’s worst Hallmark holiday. It all starts off with…

Stage One: Oblivion

Congratulations! You’ve successfully survived yet another holiday season as a single person.

great success gif

For two months straight, your Facebook feed felt like it was sponsored by freakin’ Kay Jewelers, and you’re fairly certain that about 150 of your 552 Facebook friends got engaged between Thanksgiving and New Years.

single during the holiday season

Sure, you’re happy that your “friend” who you haven’t seen since 1992 has found the love of her life, but fielding through all of the engagement announcements is getting tiring.

single on new years

Nonetheless, you survived — in fact, your bitchy Aunt Dot managed to limit herself to one snide comment about how you haven’t brought a boyfriend to Christmas since 2001.

single during the holidays

Screw her – next year, you’ll totally have a boyfriend. OK, so you’ve been saying that for the last four years, but whatever. THIS will be the year that you get off your ass and start dating!

single during the holidays sucks

You’re feeling good about life and excited about a new year…

new year gif

…until you begin to notice something strange while binge watching episodes of The Bachelor. “Why are their 537 commercials for jewelry stores on TV?” you ask yourself.

watching tv gif

And then it hits you: it’s almost Valentine’s Day.

UGH.

eyeroll gif

 


 

Stage Two: Denial

“Whatever,” you tell yourself, “it’s totally a cheesy Hallmark holiday.”

single on valentines day gif

Besides, being single on Valentine’s Day is a blessing in disguise. You totally don’t have to worry about silly things like buying a gift or shaving your legs. #blessed

single on valentines

Anyway, even when you weren’t single, Valentine’s Day was still kind of a letdown. Remember that one time your ex boyfriend that gave you an unwrapped DVD of a movie he wanted to see as a Valentine’s Day gift? Ugh.

worst valentines day

Also, it’s a proven fact that there’s a huge increase in breakups right before Valentine’s Day. Basically, you’re so lucky you don’t have to worry about such things.

valentines day breakup

Who needs a boyfriend? Not you! *finger snap*

single valentines day gif


 

 

Stage Three: Disgust

Several days have passed, and you’ve somehow manage to forget that Valentine’s Day is approaching. The brain works in miraculous ways, doesn’t it?

being single on valentines day

Unfortunately, you’re jerked back to reality when you ask a friend to hang out and she responds, “Awwww I’d *totally* love to… but Brad planned a romantic weekend in Galena for Valentine’s Day. Isn’t he the sweetest????”

being single on valentines day gif

You text a few of your single girlfriends to see if they’re interested in hanging out, and each response is more depressing than the last one.

being single on valentines gif

Meanwhile, you’ve begun receiving odd Facebook messages from guys you haven’t talked to in years. A few weird guys from high school even decide to poke you.

creepy guys from high school

Desperation is clearly at an all-time high.

valentines day gif

 

Finally, Valentine’s Day has arrived. You make plans with your BFF to get dinner at the least romantic place you can think of.

going out on valentines day

After you’re seated, the host turns to you and asks, “Would you and your girlfriend like to see the wine menu?”

golden-girls

After you and your “girlfriend” order, you look around and realize you’re surrounded by obnoxious couples.

valentines day sucks

Basically, you’re in hell.

annoying couples valentines day

You finish dinner in a hurry and make a move to leave… and get stuck behind an annoying couple.

annoying pda couple valentines day

At this point, both you and your “girlfriend” are over it and decide to call it a night.

i hate valentines day

You go home and torture yourself by looking at pictures of happy couples on Instagram.

valentines day depressed


 

Stage Four: Acceptance

Just as you’re about to break down and install Tinder on your phone, you remember one tiny, little fact…

single on valentines day funny

you’re the one that chose to be single.

Pelear-sin-groserías-8

You’re the one that decided to spend the last few years planning trips versus planning a wedding…

tumblr_n2clj7paQD1rsxbklo1_500

…and enjoy some alone time before you settle down.

rs_500x367-160127103131-Best_Oprah_Winfrey_GIFs_5

 

…and most importantly, you’ve chosen to not waste your time in dead-end relationships solely to avoid being single.

MTMxNTk1NjA5Mzk1MjA2NjIy

And thankfully, it’s 2016 and not 1916 and you’re not obligated to marry someone for the sake of being married.

giphy (4)

At the end of the (Valentine’s) day, what it boils down to is this: being in love is great, but learning to love your own company is even better.

single on valentines day gif monroe

 

Happy Valentine’s Day!

 

Featured Image: Flickr/crystal_cakes

Let's take things to the next level.

Occasional updates, no BS.

I agree to have my personal information transfered to MailChimp ( more information )

We'll never go 'Stage 5 Clinger' on your inbox, baby.

Co-founder / Editor of Daily Urbanista. Kitten GIF aficionado. Will travel for... travel.

Color of the flowers?